That Sound That Once Was And May Soon Be

My car radio has been acting up since the weekend. It turns on but the stations haven't been coming through. For the first few days, it had just been static. I love music and this was just torture for me since I was at my folks' and didn't have any CDs.

Then, the radio just mysteriously cleared up, but not for long. I would hit the seek button and after cycling through about 10 times, it might catch a station.

Stranger yet was today. When I got into the car this morning, there was no station and I couldn't get one until halfway through my commute. Then, when I left work, it was perfectly fine.

I was enjoying a great song from the eighties when I heard a strange sound. It wasn't scary, it wasn't something to be worried about. I shockingly enjoyed it. It was the sound of me singing to the music. There were no choking sobbing sounds that accompany the tunes of a song that meant something to Jake and myself or reminds me of him. It was a sound that I used to hear everyday, but haven't heard since the day he left this world.

Often I've felt like it has wanted to break loose, but I haven't been able to let it go. It's like a shame that I've suppressed and today it just had to get out. I felt it in my chest. Now I feel like it has seen the light of day and doesn't want to be contained any longer.